Well structured song. Good melodies/ themes. The song is definitly telling an interresting story.
my biggest issue is some of the sounds you're using and the levelling. Pretty much all the drums you're using are all fine and work okish, but I feel they, and especially the kick, could do with a bit of punch and prominence in the mix. Also maybe add some additional FX to guide your transitions.
Your leads could do with a bit of fullness. You can work this up with a stereo enhancer, layering or adding reverb/delay & compression.
My biggest issue I think is the bass you're employing, especially the arp one you start of with, it sounds...hollow and in the wrong set of frequencies for that type of element/sound in your track.... a bit like a casio keyboard preset if you get my drift. You could try to fix this with all sorts of hoops and stiches, but I would recommend you replace it with something else.
so in short. - levels particulairy drums, - more fullness in the sounds you use for your melodic elements and do something about that bass
for the rest i think great work on the theme's melodies etc.
@Magnevi could you give this man your ears? I'm still only on headphones due to sleeping toddler shenanigans & moving places.